Tan Tropez

Standing at the coffee machine Pete remarked to me, “You look very radiant today!”

“Why, thank you!” I said, feeling rather pleased.

“Yes, have you got that Saint Tropez tan stuff on?”

No I blinking well haven’t! In order to quickly disassociate myself from all Essex Girl connotations, I explained that I had been quite tanned since coming back from Spain.

“Nah, that’s that Saint Tropez stuff,” he insisted. “You look all orangey.”

Speechless, I removed one of my sandals and showed him the white, untanned strap lines on my foot.

“Oh,” he said, disappointed.